Relationship Advice
Relationship Advice

Relationships often get destroyed because of miscommunication. She or he said this or did that, and before you know it, you’re sitting alone in your bedroom browsing through online profiles and regretting that you ever fell for someone so stubborn and insensitive. This can occur at any time during any relationship, from the first date through matrimony. The setting and circumstances may be different, but the underlying reason behind the inevitable breakup is the same. Men and women speak different languages. They formulate and express their feelings and emotions differently. Their needs and expectations are different. unless you’re aware of these differences, you will constantly be frustrated, confused, and hopelessly clueless. What you consider good moves will be seen as bad, right will appear to be wrong, and earnest attempts at compliments will be perceived as insults.

Here are some examples:

Women love receiving flowers from their man. It makes them feel special. Most men just don’t get the whole flower thing. That’s probably because most men don’t ever want to be the recipients of flowers from anyone regardless of the situation. According to male thinking, buying flowers is simply a waste of money. They only last a couple of days anyway, so why bother? The only way a man will understand the importance of bringing flowers to a woman is if someone tells him to. Unless he has sisters, close female friends, or if he used to see his dad give them to his mom, he might not get understand. If he doesn’t, he probably won’t figure it out on his own unless you tell him straight out. You must realize that it’s not that he doesn’t appreciate you or care for you. He simply does not speak your language.

Women need to feel that their man is interested in them, all the time. The source of need is irrelevant. It’s just there. I don’t necessarily get that. Men don’t feel the need to “check in” with their woman several times during the day either via phone or SMS just to say hello and chat. Men use communication as a tool for achieving their objectives. They call someone on the phone when they have something specific to say to that person. They usually don’t call just to “check in”. Many women mistakenly think that if their man doesn’t call or text them multiple times throughout the day, they don’t care about them or aren’t interested in them. So when men don’t call or text, women get frustrated, nervous, or uptight and end up calling or texting the men. That just makes these women seem needy and insecure, which is definitely what men DO NOT want in a girlfriend. Just because a man doesn’t call or text during the day doesn’t mean he isn’t interested. He just doesn’t speak the same language you do.

Women hate it when men look at other women, especially if they dare to compliment them. To man, this is standard make behavior, one of the perks of being a guy. All men do it, not just construction workers. Just because a man looks at another woman or complements her does not mean that he’s secretly planning to have an affair with her. It’s just something men do. Having said that, here’s a special message for the men, so hear me well: DON’T EVER CHECK OUT, or COMPLEMENT ANOTHER WOMAN in the presence of your woman. Don’t do it. Please trust me on this. Just don’t. Assuming you got that, be aware that your woman might attempt to test you, or should I say “entrap” you.

Here’s a possible scenario: You’re strolling in Central Park with your woman on a bright Sunday morning when you recognize a Sports Illustrated swimsuit cover model passing the other way. Your woman (or wife) turns to you and innocently asks, “she’s beautiful, isn’t she?” You naively respond, “yes”, and with that tiny three letter word condom yourself to the doghouse for an unknown period of time and open yourself up to an endless stream of insecure or aggressive questions, remarks, and comments that you’ll find extremely hard to field. The correct answer to your woman’s test question is either, “I didn’t really notice” or “she’s not really my type”. Sure it’s a lie, but a worthy one that will cause blessings and praises to rain down upon you.

These are only a few examples of the fundamental differences in thinking and communication between men and women that can potentially destroy a relationship if not identified and understood in the proper context. It’s up to you to recognize these different communication methods, deal with them appropriately, and keep your relationship happy and healthy.

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